Saturday, July 31, 2010

Happy (Cinematic) Postmodernists: A History of Cheerfulness

Since he's scheduled to write & direct a film adaptation of Don DeLillo's Cosmopolis, let's give David Cronenberg a hearty welcome to the HaPomo fold. For 4+ decades, this native son of Toronto has been delighting us Yankees with his vision of the human body as an unstable, viscera-spurting sack of tissue. And when you destabilize scientific ethics and sexual identity too, boy oh boy, there's no end to the fun! Just look at that smirk! Maybe he's just had one of his films premiere at Cannes and is pondering how best to photograph Viggo Mortensen's penis in the future.* So let's honor Mr. Cronenberg by remembering some of more fancy-free moments from his filmography...
  • The Brood: awww, motherly love.
  • Videodrome: Every day's a happy day when you're a sleazy James Woods!
  • The Dead Zone: Christopher Walken's got a fever, and the only cure is more visions of impending death.
  • Dead Ringers: The only thing more happy than the existence of gynecologist Jeremy Irons... is the existence of two gynecologist Jeremy Ironses!
  • Om nom nom Naked Lunch.
  • See previous remark about Viggo Mortensen's penis.
*As we learned recently, sometimes for-real postmodernists do real this blog. Therefore, I'd like to point out that any resemblance between this David Cronenberg and any real David Cronenbergs, living or dead, is pure coincidence. (Outpostmodern that.) Also, Mr. Cronenberg, if you're reading, I'm a huge fan. Also -- hey look, it's rock star David Cronenberg! Why, with that silver mane, he could be David Byrne!


  1. Who could say it isn't beautiful?

  2. Ha. You said penis.

    Also, 'Jeff Goldblum's rotting fingernails' is the greatest tag ever.